Reflection: Bates Motel

Hey Bloggie!

All through last week, I was seduced by the notion of working from home tomorrow since the forecast was calling for about 20" of snow. As I write this, there's absolutely nothing on the ground. Like not even a fluff of snow. Now I have to mentally prepare to be up and about tomorrow. Sigh.

Also throughout the week, I saw the ad for season 2 of "Bates Motel". I had never seen it, but as a fan of Freddie Highmore, I knew this would be a show with a twist. Freddie tends to play unique characters. I wasn't wrong. I watched all but the last 2 episodes of season 1 on Saturday. I finished watching the rest of the season this afternoon. It's a really good show and is a prequel to the I believe 1960 movie, "Psycho". The show is about Norman Bates' childhood so you can understand how he came to be what he became.

I can see how many people might not be able to watch this. It is in most ways, a disturbing show. But it really got me thinking. Much as you can see how disturbed this child is, you can't really blame him. I had made up my mind before watching that Norman was a beast and should get the strongest punishment ever. I never saw Psycho so I don't know what happened to him. Then I started watching the show and knew it wasn't as I had initially thought. The child didn't suddenly turn psycho. Events in the very first episode showed how unfair life could be and the desperate moves people can be forced to make. Even though I knew Norma Bates was definitely a creep, it was obvious she had a rough childhood herself.

So my wheels got turning. I don't think that many of us as humans recognize the roles we play in this world. We don't understand what parenting has done for us and what it'll do for the children we have. In the show, you see a cycle. The mother had a rough life, she didn't seek any help, is crazy and now has a son who is ten times worse. She sees her son is troubled but doesn't get him any help either. I shudder to think what kind of child he would raise. Let me say though, that Norman Bates is a fictional character but a very plausible real character. There are many Normans in the world. Some hopefully, will never get that full trigger and get help instead.

The way our parents/guardians raise us affects us through out life. We sometimes don't want to make the same mistakes they made. This can only happen if we're able to see their mistakes clearly. Some children are not fortunate to see the other ways of the world. Their parents do a very good job of letting them believe only in one reality and making sure these children are completely sheltered from the rest of the world.

There are so many instances of these things. Look at a child whose mother grew up in a household that allowed her father to have as many mistresses as possible. The mother believes that this is the way of life and so marries a man that will do the same. What are the chances that the young child will either allow her husband create a mockery of her marriage or do the same thing to his wife? Parents that insult and fight each other in the presence of their children, parents that use their children as crutches, parents that abandon their children, parents that transfer hatred, the list goes on. These are all people ruining innocent lives.

We are very quick to blame the children and society for the things that go wrong in their lives. Of course sometimes this is very true. But other times, their immediate environments are to blame. I've had the opportunity to learn that children pick things up very early. Things you think they'll forget, they usually don't. And only God knows how long things fester in some of them. I still have friends who are afraid of relationships/can't have healthy ones because their examples scarred them. These same parents can't understand why their children are scarred. It just doesn't make sense to them that their children can't be in healthy relationships. They see absolutely nothing that can be responsible for this sort of behavior. They are blind to the fact that they are the root cause of their children's predicaments.

I think that before you start having kids, you should think about the kind of life you want them to have. Think about how you can make yourself better so they can be better. You are the first example your children will have and the person they either want to emulate or make proud at all costs. Don't raise any more Norman Bates. The world has seen enough of those.

The saying goes, the evil that men do live after them. Don't let the evil doer whose legacy is emotionally disturbed and traumatized children be yours.

Cheers,
Tonia

Oh and season 2 of Bates Motel starts tomorrow on A&E.