Hooking Up Is Not For Everyone
Before I begin, let me first take a deep breath (explanation
to follow). Done!
As a certified hook-upper (I certify from my mama belle), I know
the pains it takes to hook people up. You can’t just assume that because you
are friends with two people of the opposite (or same) sex that they will instantly
hit it off (my dear, your friend + your friend doesn't always = a good thing). That
they have you in common doesn't mean they’ll have anything else in common. I've
heard people complain about their hook-uppers. From “I can’t believe she could
even give that guy my number’’ to ‘‘all this time, I thought she was my friend!’’
Just like that, some friendships have either ended or not remained the same. All
I’m saying is if you no sabi do am, no take style try am unless you ready for
consequence.
Assisting my point here is Nigerian movie “Bursting Out”
(shameless but relevant movie plug). If you watch the movie, you’ll understand
that there’s a skill to hooking people up. Little detour here… I love this
movie!!! My sisters and I use lines from this movie from time to time. It also
helps that I love the cast J.
Okay back to writing. In the movie, you see Zara’s friends trying to hook her
up (marriage na by force). If you’re like my sisters and I, you’ll feel for Zara
when she has to meet some of these guys. I mean it was so obvious… what were
her friends thinking?! If her friendships hadn't been rooted in love and years,
I tell you she had every reason to dump her girlfriends. As in, the guys were
that bad.
Hooking people up or giving recommendations or connecting
people (all na the same) is not a moi moi something. You have to be willing to
invest time if you really want to hook people up. Look for people that could be
compatible not people you think should be compatible. They should have something
other than you in common. My secret is to introduce them as friends and see if
they hit it off. If they do, then I continue to fan the fire by dropping amazing
gist about one to the other (oya pay me for that info… I’m not joking). My best
analogy of a relationship has always been applying for a job. The ones that have
the qualifications are interviewed and only the one that passes the interview
with flying colours
gets the job. So if you’re hooking your friend up, check his/her job posting
and scan resumes accordingly. It’s definitely acceptable if you don’t have matches
for your friend (tell the truth and save everyone the drama). Don’t sweat it.
You must be wondering why I’m over explaining this thing Bloggie. Well I’ll tell you. Some
of my guy friends have come from some sort of hook up. They have ended up my
friends because either the timing was wrong, e.g. I moved across the Atlantic
or changed states, or we decided our friendship was great. Anyways, my hook ups
(however few) have been cool except now. Recently, someone tried to hook me up
and let me tell you Bloggie it’s been a WTH moment since day 1. As in ehn, the thing has not
attempted to work at all. Not that I’m not trying. I am! The thing just can’t/won’t
pick up. No conversation, no chemistry, nothing in common… need I go on? Obviously
this is a case of not checking the job descriptions I’m posting (change is
constant) and I have to admit it is very annoying. This is why I had to take a
deep breath. I just got off the phone with this guy and this time I am
convinced it has been a colossal waste of my time and I just can’t suffer
another conversation. I’ll spare you the boring details.
To all the people out there that have had to endure a
horrible friend hook up, I feel you. Here’s to never having to endure another
one of these!
Oh and here’s the trailer for Bursting Out . Enjoy J
Tonia
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